Bail Bond Confessions Blog

The good, the bad, the ugly | September 9, 2009

In my state, when you get your license, you have to go to every county you wish to do business in and submit your license to that county’s clerk of court.  Every county is different, but the fee structure is the same.  Once you are in the clerk of court’s computer, you can then get your contact info posted in the jails.

My state has lots of counties and I’m not planning on servicing all of them.  I’ve used a formula that includes geographic distance, amount of crime, and amount of competition in choosing where I want to work.  Today, I went to the last three counties on my list.  They are fairly rural and unfortunately spread out from each other by a bit of distance.  I got to the first one around 10am and discovered that out of an office of eight people, only two people could process my license.  Both of those people were in the court (which was in session).  I was told I could wait till lunch, which was to be around 1pm.  I had little choice but to wait.  I attempted to sit in the courtroom to at least view the proceedings, but a bailiff would not allow me in there because I admitted to having a cell phone, even though the phone was turned off (PER THE SIGN POSTED OUTSIDE THE COURTROOM).  He insisted that I lock my phone in my car or I would not be allowed in the courtroom.  Instead, I planted my ass in the clerk of courts office.  Eventually, one of the other six workers took pity on me and arranged to have one of the two workers in the court room come out and process my paperwork when she had an opportunity.  She told me that they push the contact info to the county detention center, so I didn’t need to stop there.  Total time spent, about an hour.

Then I get in my car and drove an hour to the next county.  It was a pleasant drive though I had a hard time finding the courthouse. The street name listed on my directions and GPS didn’t exist any longer.  I found the “Square” which many of these old southern towns have, but the building had burned down so many times that eventually they moved it a few blocks away.

Once I found it, it didn’t take long to get my license processed and they were very friendly.  The deputy at the door even recommended a lunch spot. Next, I stopped by their detention center.  There is a small air-conditioned hallway that was packed full with about 15 people waiting for visitation.  Another 20 or so people were waiting outside smoking.  I got in “line”, but the line wasn’t moving.  Being the only white male, well dressed, and carrying paperwork, eventually one of the women in line asked if I was here for visitation.  I told her no, I was just trying to drop off some paperwork.  She was like “Child, get your ass up here then.  We’re all waiting on these damn guards and they ain’t in no rush to help us.”  The line (all black women) seemed amused that I would wait patiently (I was out in the heat) and not make any fuss and they seemed happy for me skip up to the front.  I explained what I was there for and a deputy took my information.  She posted a copy of my license next to her desk, started to say something and then got called away in a big hurry.  I waited a few moments and started to leave.  I said “I guess I’m done…” and one of the women in line said “Hell no. You stay right there and wait for her to get back so you are sure its done right.”  So I stayed put.

After a few moments of waiting, I asked the ladies in line if everyone was there for visitation and I got a minor chorus of “uh huh, yup”.  I mentioned that this was my 5th detention center in two days and none of them had more than two or three people waiting at any given time.  This caused a lot of snickering about how backwards this particular county can be.

Then another woman asked if I was with the State government.  I explained that I was a bail bondsman and I was trying to get my contact information posted in the jail so I could do business.  She asked if I was local and I told her I was about an hour away, but it isn’t a far drive or anything.  She asked if I would give her a business card so I said sure and handed her one. Then another woman asked for one also.  After that, the deputy said I was done so I wished them good luck and went on my way.  This time, I think I did it right.  No one can accuse me of soliciting business, they asked me for my card.  My only mistake?  I gave them only one card each.  I need to remember to hand out at least two cards per person.  They can keep one and pass one on if needed. Still learning, I guess.

I skipped the deputies suggestion and instead had a nice lunch at one of my favorite fancy restaurants.  It’s in a strip mall in the middle of nowhere, but you would swear you were in NYC.  $15 for French Dip with Truffle Fries.  I tipped the waitress well and included a couple business cards.  You never know.

Finally, I got in the car for the last hour and a half drive to the border county. My route took me through many small towns and picturesque farm fields.  I got to the courthouse at around 4pm. Made my way through the maze of offices to the clerk’s office and was directed by six office workers to another part of the building.  None of those six were doing anything, they were just hanging out talking, playing solitaire on the computer, and reading newspapers.  I get to the right place and explain myself.  The woman behind the counter takes my paperwork and walks away.  She comes back a little while later with another lady.  This new lady explains that they only process bail bondsman licenses on Tuesdays between 11am-3pm and that I should come back then! I pleaded my case being from out-of-town and all.  They took my paperwork and payment, but reiterated that they will not process me until Tuesday 11am-3pm.  I kept my cool and thanked them.

Pardon my french, but that is just FUBAR.  They spent more time telling me they won’t process my paperwork than any one of the other counties spent actually processing it.  I understand it is a two part process.  They have to stamp my license and give me a copy(s).  Then they have to enter it in the system.  I begged them just to stamp and copy it so I could go to the detention center and get my contact info posted.  Since I don’t have any clients, it doesn’t matter to me if they wait until Tuesday to put me in the system.  No luck, she refused to budge.  She told me that the clerk of court has decided that they are just way to busy in that office to have to stop and process bail bondsman’s licenses every few minutes which is why they only do it between 11am-3pm on Tuesdays.  She might be able to mail it to me, she said she would call once she talked with the clerk of court.  I told her, I would be happy to pay for mailing.  She told me that it is $2.50 a copy (HIGHWAY FRIGGING ROBBERY!), so I wrote her a check for $5 and told her to just give me one copy and use the rest to mail it.  We’ll see what happens. Unbelievable.



1 Comment »

  1. Thats very good to know… thanks

    Comment by Kelli Garner — October 2, 2009 @ 9:15 am

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